Laxative for the brain?

In my head I had thoughts of photos and lovely sentiments for awesome birthday posts for both Mom and Spencer.


They didn't quite come out the way I wanted. I still can't seem to write more than just the basic stuff as the emo block is still in play.  It is affecting a lot of aspects of my life.


Someday I'll be able to write again.

There has been a creative block - but after 2 months, I've found myself wanting to make something again.

Progress.

I've been trying to finish two projects that I had been working on before I ran off to Texas and Mom passed away. The knitting project I can't even bring myself to look at let alone pick up.  I have, however, been working on the beading project.  Unfortunately it is an epic fail, so I'm completely changing the whole damn thing. Hopefully this new incarnation will work. This is number 4 or 5 already with each incarnation having at least 4-5 tries before I move on...each try another Fail.  If this last try does not work, I think I'll just have to let that one sit for awhile.

The last time I had such an emotional blow (when Dad passed away in 1998), I went into a creative frenzy and even learned a new art - painting.  Dad painted, so I learned what he did.  This time, Mom and I did the same sort of things - needle and yarn crafts - so I find myself "blocked".  My brain full of ideas that I just can't bring into being.

I think the only thing I can do is wait for the emo block to work itself out.  The only laxative for this I know of is....time.

Sigh.

Happy Birthday Spencer!

Today is my son's 18th birthday.

I am extrememly happy for him.

I am sad for me.

I am proud of the man he has become.

Happy Birthday Spencer!  May you have many more and may all your dreams and wishes come true! 

Love you LOTS, Mom.

Sigh

Today would have been Mom's 81st Birthday.

I took a photo of an old photo of Mom that I wanted to post.  On my phone it looks fine.  In reality it is blurry.

I wanted to write a nice post and put that old photo in it - it is one of my favorite ones of her.

Suddenly I have no words and now I have no photo.

I miss you Mom.

Edited to add:  Jeez, I could have at least said Happy Birthday.  "Happy Birthday Mom".